You'll find on here, some of the posters make more sense when p*ssed.

I don't want anyone to to know I'm NOT drunk when I write crap.

Pippasweetie. You can always use the Drunk Tab as an editing room and repost again later......

Great idea Grant! I even contributed when I didn't look at the screen. Incredible!

Great idea, stop us "offending" some of the younger crew with drunken dribble....like it... :D

Hey - get in line, my "Dumbass Questions" tab is still waiting to become reality. Or we could just integrate and have a DAD section - Drunk and Dumbass questions? I enjoy compromise as long as I get to keep my shirt on.

Dumbass posting under the Drunk Tab goes without saying and would both encouraged and quite possibly completely unavoidable.

Bit dissapointed about the shirt though....

sorry grant.

oh and i'll assume that whoever did the meh and fail are about me keeping my shirt on as well.

Why so may Meh and Fails? I love this idea.
I'm sure to be a regular user of that tab.

:D

Can't wait to see how many death threats I get from such a thread. It should also be quite entertaining to see who the insecure, "why did you fail me! sob sob" people are, or how aggressive they get when they're drunk.

:P

Anyone gets upset by meh and fail shouldn't post !!!!!

Grant while I support you idea in concept, any post which includes the combination of "Grant" + "Saturday" + "11pm+" has my alarm bells ringing.

I guess the drunk tab would alert us to all those other occasions as well, such as "Grant" + "day ending in 'y'" + "post breakfast"

Have I told you lately that I love you, Nat?

Woody2, it's usually much later than that.... What are you doing posting at 11pm?

Virezo, your relationship with Nat is quite unhealthy.

VNBritExpat I gave you a Meh and a Fail because you may as well be famous for something. Why not?

Don't Meh or Fail Dawnation for keeping her shirt either on or off or window open or closed, as the case may be.

Grant, how can I not love Nat with such an accurate answer like that?
Folks! Natinnam has been getting better since he was in Hanoi. That's for sure!

Virezo, his getting better but his still a twat...and I say that as a friend fo his and his family... :D

Aye, was told if i tone it down a bit, i might get a invite to a TNH meet-up, that was 6 or 7 weeks back, tw*ts !!

I got an invite, did they not send you one?

Dan, you look 30 in your current avatar. Change back to the previous one.

An invitation? What's that? I just came.

thats cool cause im older than 30 :D

Thinking it over, shouldnt the drunk tab be separate from the dumbass tab since the drunk ones are not really meant to be answered whereas the dumbass ones are intended to get answers, even halfhearted ones?

And I thought dumbass was one word, yet the site keeps informing me it should be dumb ass. Sigh - all this time and I thought my scatological terms were written correctly. I should take a page from Dan and Nat's book and just type ...

And I thought "dumbass" was "dumbARSE". Maye its the same but a cultural spelling difference? What site says the words should be seperated? I agree Dawnie - "dumb ass" looks "dumbass"
Keep the word together but the dumbass and drunk buttons apart.

@Virezo I believe thats a smear of vegemite young Dan has on his top lip.

Nat miss a hookup? Maybe when "elite users" reach those lofty heights they lose their edge, and expect some kind of a gilt edged invitation in a flash red envelope or something.... Whereas the rest of us "common" or "garden variety" users have to hone our instincts and keep alert to make sure we claim any perks and freebies going - who needs an invite to crash a NH hookup? Eye of the tiger Nat, eyes on the prize.

12.26 a.m Hmmm which button do I press......?

i feel obliged to post here cause im quite drunk....no pun intended granturanass... just want to say i cant wait for new hanoian meet up next weekend...should be a blast..hope to see you all there :D
damn vodka redbulls.... i cant sleep...but i should...
good night all you non non alcos.... peace and love to all....

Oh dear !!

Some people shouldn't be let near a computer after a sniff of the barmaids apron.

who's "sniffing the barmaid's apron???"

{Last night I think I was underneath it....}

my head hurts.... :(

"Beer"

I think the necessity for the Drunk Tab has found of proof of need....

"Beer"

Or maybe the neverending "drunk thread"?

Note - I bounced out of bed this a.m. full of anticipation for some more NH early morning/latenight love sharing and group hugs but was sadly disappointed :(

"Beer"

Unfortunately I had to skip the late night ramblings on ANH due to an early flight. Everyone else was looking like they were going to be way too shattered to even find the keyhole let alone press Enter.

I hope it wasn't too disappointing. Must be a bit like Window Ba letting you down by not slamming the window shut on que....

I'll try not disappoint. Will be full of Chinese rice wine most nights this week I expect.

"Beer & Rice Wine"

Many thanks in anticipation :)

"Beer"

I would have posted this in the "Good Ad Versus Bad Ad" but humour doesn't seem to cut it there....

Two condoms in the Chinese hotel bathroom.

Labelled "Paid Use 10Yuan", fair enough...

Version 1

"Jinxiao Lotion (Unisex)

It contains the essence of the purely natural plant, caneffe-ctive clean adult vulva and disinfect hidepathogen, alleviate itch, dispel the peculiar smell, and protects human body's physiological environment from infection as much as possible, it is effective guarentee of high quality of the voyage, healthy, sexy pleasure.
It suitable for washing when before and after in the sexual intercourse, at home, travel, swimming, do not have any to stimulate to the skin with the sde effect."

Version 2

"Jinxiao Condom (Abnormity Particle)

The abnormity particle added natural aroma essence, fragrant and pleasure, can promote the vagina muscle to shrink, increase and strengthen person's sex experience, let both sides experience the passion, boosting high altogether. Can block the suffering but not lure. Width 52mm 2mm"

Hahahahaha.....translation software has a very long way to go.

I'm actually scared.

"Beer"

I'm not scared. They wouldn't write it is it wasn't true would they? Could you bring me some souvenirs next time you go to China, please? The jinxiao condom (abnormality particle)sounds worth a try - though I am hoping that size is the item before being unwrapped etc.

(presses "probably should be DRUNK TAB")

Many Two star hotels have a lovely basket of such stuff - a couple of condoms, usually two expanding towels, matching his and her's 'body wash' for after the event, AND a battery operated thingy for the man to wear and the woman to share.

All of them have fantastical Chinglish on the back. Great stuff!

The thing that didn't come out in the text here was the "Width 52mm plus-minus 2mm". Now that's a pretty exacting spec.

Tried the battery operated thing but I think it was just a hair dryer......

Sweet. Magical condoms. Bring me back a few if you don't use them all. (Trying them on is considered used)

Reminds me of the magical vietnamese bra i was reading about last week. http://www.thanhniennews.com/healthy/?catid=8&newsid=49852

Cures frigidity. hahahaha. I'm gunna start airdropping them over Hanoi.

Ok ok. First person with their hand in the air gets to be the nano bra inspector!!

"Beer"

New project ! Nano man ! Oh wait, that sounds more like I'm 52mm plus-minus 2mm man. Ahh loser...

"Beer"

[a href="http://www.freesmileys.org/smileys.php"][img src="http://www.freesmileys.org/smileys/smiley-eatdrink009.gif"][/a]

For Grant (and anybody else, have one on me!)
Replace [ with <
Replace ] with >

While were in the mood !!

Now I know why smiley is so popular.

drunk tab post:...just watched QLD destory NSW in the SoO rugby at jaspas, if your not aussie you probably wont understand....great match...

Canetoads Rule !

Xin chao thua qui vi! Qui vi co khoe khong?

Anh de2facon nghi rang, hom nay (nay bay gio) Anh uong bia qua, ma khong xao vi cac ban NH cung uong nieu lam....or something like that...OK , so I can't spell in VN.Just plain forgot how....Looking for a new teacher.

There is great line from the movie Casablanca where Rick Blaine says " I'm a drunkard" and the reply from Cpt. Renault is " That makes Rick a citizen of the world"... or something like that?

So, are my eyes really ... are my eyes?...or something like that or maybe In Vino Veritas or something like that?

Congratulations to Grant. The new post/tab is cool.

In Vino Veritas !!!

“A drunk man's words are a sober man's thoughts”

I can't remember who said that but it's scary and hard to completely refute. I've regretted more than a few things I've written here on the turps but at the same time I just think bugger it, I don't totally repudiate any of it - perhaps just the tone at times. Look at Byron, Paul Scott or Will Self - sometimes it might just be the case that, in vino luminarium.

However, as a matter of course I just assume that a fair percentage of people on this site, like myself, are pissed or semi-pissed and I often amuse myself by trying to figure out which is which. The absence of a auto-outing option at least forces me to try to keep up a level of coherence that I might not otherwise bother with. It's like attending a party where you've hit the Chardy a bit hard but am still trying to convince people it really was a good idea to invite you despite fact that your ranting and raving is causing people to roll their eyes and begin to do some deleting in their mental address books.

So Grant, while I see where you're coming from I think it keeps everyone's game up by forcing us to pretend to be less floothered than we actually are.

Chin Chin.

"Beer"

Cheers all.
Shame about the State of Origin result though....

"Beer"

....and you wonder why I might lean towards Dan.....

"Beer"

Straighten up. There's way too much leaning going on for this hour of the day / level of inebriation.

It's the trans-Tassie I care more about

"Beer"

Grant, do you mean the ANZAC test match?
I believe Australia won 38-10. baaaaaa

I'm not drunk now... but any chance to pay out on a Kiwi/New South Welshman.

"Beer"

Queenslander's......what can I say

"Beer"

Queenslanders.... Great sportsman, great lovers.

Were those the words you were after?

"Beer"

No, but I could use some of those letters to come up with a suitable description.....

“I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.” Frank Sinatra

"Beer"

"Beer"

“Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.” Benjamin Franklin

My favourite

“You can only be young once. But you can always be immature.”

"Beer"

"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading"

Henny Youngman

Here's to alcohol, the cause of—and solution to—all life's problems

Homer Simpson

"Beer"

"Damn Chinese business dinners, I'm drunk."

Grant

"Beer"

yeah well, in that case can you tell me where I put the tv remote....?

"Beer"

I don't know how to put this. When did you last see the remote? Were you trashed at the time? Did you try calling your remote via your mobile (obvious sign of drunken desperation)? If not, try this. Flex the lower pelvic muscles and if CNN pops up on the TV then unfortunately it's a problem that will require a proctolagist. If, however, a really cool movie results on the TV screen then...ummm....I think I should hit the drubk tab now....

Lame, sorry for your plight.

"Beer"

You are really a spammer!!!

hI gRANt, HAD to do the obligatory after hookUp post to say that tonights meeT was great and I think you Will know which movie I am quoting when I say "suffer in your jocks'..Mojitos very tasty and I think my new brand of deoderant was working really well.Not sure IF Dan was wearing Pants or not as he was hiding in The corner. BAd luck to you for missin it.

"Beer"

You obviously enjoyed the Mojito's. Well done. Was a bit of a hicup going on there with the shift key.

Sounds like a great night. Flew in two hours late. Not happy.

Dan can't hide in corners. He "Lurks".

Viewed 747 times. Appropriate.....

"Beer"

"Beer"

Just being annoying....


"Beer"

That was VERY annoying.

You have been warned.

ROFLMAO. Don't you folks ever sleep?

The Drunk Thread is being neglected.

When is Dan coming back and anyway, is there no beer in Malaysia?

Some beer in hotels... bugger all on the street :-(

never fear i am here....yes there is beer in Malaysia its just ridiculously expensive (similar to Australia) so was a very sober trip :D cheapest i saw in china town was two tigers for 35MR (about $12usd)

"Beer"

I think I've offended myself by posting drunk and making sense. Then again...tomorrow's Judge is a harsh mistress. Would I be correct Miss. Sam Cranky Potato Stamp?

Going to Court tomorrow morning. This will be interesting. The guy who stole most of my worldly possessions is on trial. Planning on being magnanimous...unless he's got a really bad haircut...or looks at me and dares to smile. I'm sure one of the P****e will be wearing my watch so I'll give the chump a break. He's only going to steal from you to pay it back.

"Beer"

..and now it seems Danthetaydevil was just leading me on. He promised a drunk post. I feel so...used :-(

oh pip, dont fret im still here....just got back from fins and cuba, both good. cuba i think/hope might have had a power power failure cause it was quite warm in there and the beer was warmish,from the reviews i expected better... ill give it another chance however... but hopefully its better next time....

Grant - what happened in court?

Also wondered that myself, but Dawnie you also have a few answers to confess-

1. Any outcome from the mop/fish sauce combo?

2. Are you currently mixed up in some undercover conspiracy involving a famous person, or has your house joined the list of Hanoi's most haunted?

Confession time:

1. Not a peep on the fish sauce. Big let-down. Husband has promised that before we move to another place in Sept, he will enact true Viet-style revenge. Given the accounts of the Battle of Dien Bien Phu, the Ho Chi Minh trail, plus the Cu Chi Tunnels - am awaiting his payback to window Ba with joy.

2. I am not at liberty to either confirm nor deny any presence, whether past, present, or future of any celebrity taking up a position at the window to enjoy window Ba's comings and goings. It may just be a shadow.

As far as I know, I am also not the mother of any celebrity's children.

"Beer"

Had a posting free weekend. Was too busy trying to kill myself playing golf (well not actually playing...more like pretending to look like I knew what to do) in the heat and a wedding.

The Court went as expected. Nothing more came out of it and the guy got 4 and half years. They wanted to know if I wanted 67 Million in compensation from him. Looking at his family, who didn't have two cents to rub together, I said no. What's the point?

I thought that was just a death mask in your window...

"Beer"

*Drunk Tab Bump*
1am, chock full of Jack Daniels....Indiana Jones is on cinemax...
is there anything better??
da da da daaaa da da daaaa da da daaaaaa da da da da daaaa! damn...i dropped my whip...

"Beer"

Just who were you whipping at that time of night?

"Beer"